So, what’s your Ident “IT”y?

When I was a little girl, I dreamed of being a veterinarian and a fashion designer. Clearly, I am not in either one of those professions, ha! However, the same qualities I have today of being caring, creative, calculated, and a risk-taker line up with these professions. I thought those were my “ITs” back in the day…I would have never believed it if someone would have told me 20+ years later that I would be living in the South( I am from the Midwest ), a mother, let alone of 3,  and to top it all off a stay at home mom! I would have told them, “you are crazy!” and walked away, seriously!

You see, 20+ years ago, I actually just knew that I was never going to be a mother, because I honestly did not want to be. I planned that I would be living in New York and having cocktails with my  BFF’s every evening after a fabulous day at the design studio and/or vet clinic(because I really thought I could do both at the same exact time and I probably watched too much “Sex in the City”, lol)!  I had a “I am never going to get married, have kids, or be weighed down” kinda attitude- but it is funny how God works and what He already had in store for me!

 “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,
    before you were born I set you apart…”

  Jeremiah 1:5New International Version (NIV)

Now here I am married over 10 years to my high school sweetheart(sidenote-we broke up a lot during high school and college-young love, lol), living in the South, and the mother of my sweet babies(adopted at that, so they definitely were wanted)!

My “ITs” changed as I grew and matured and that’s ok! I am the happiest I have ever been. I went from being full-fledged career woman to longing to be a stay at home mom (this will be another post coming soon!) and having uninvited “party guest” in the bathroom  with me daily(can you tell I really have a thing with going to the bathroom alone?)!

So what is your “IT?” What are the things that you have dreamed about, longed for, always wished you would have done? Have your “ITs” changed over the last couple months or years?

My current “IT” is raising my children to be strong, confident, loving, happy, caring, pure, and full of faith, but this doesn’t fully define me or my identity. I am still a friend, a wife, a social worker, a volunteer, a lover of music/the arts, a natural hair fanatic, a beach bum, one to enjoy a good moscato every now and again, and oh, now a blogger (not necessarily in this order)!

Someone else’s “IT” may be starting a business, quitting their job, becoming a doctor,  getting married, moving to another state, becoming an author, going to school, becoming debt- free, sewing clothes, becoming an event planner, starting a ministry, becoming a parent, doing a cross-country road trip, or becoming a famous entertainer. We all have that “IT” inside of us, for some it is dormant, for other’s it is what motivates you to wake up everyday and grind.

The point of this all is that we all are full of “ITs” and it is what you do with them that can literally change your life. You are not stuck in your current situation! Your “full of it” doesn’t have to be negative or how you think other’s perceive you. Your greatest trials “the bad ITs” can literally lead to your greatest blessings. My bad “IT” was dealing with infertility and the guilt of saying I never wanted to be a mother. Little did I know that God had adoption in store for my husband and I all along. Will I ever be a mother to our biological children? Only God knows but I don’t let infertility define me as a person because I am still a mother!


No one knows what the future may hold but we do have a part in the choices we make today that can impact our future! Our family. Photo Credit: Heather S.



We are all wired to be great, to live with purpose, to make choices, and to change(and be the change).

I know someone is reading this and saying” this all sounds good, but how?” The first step is allowing your “IT” to become alive, giving it meaning and priority! Secondly, having a vision and mapping out baby steps to achieve it. Most successful CEO’s don’t become millionaires overnight, sunflower seeds don’t become flowers overnight,  I didn’t become a mother of three overnight(well almost, lol) , and your “IT” won’t likely manifest overnight. You have to start somewhere, so why not today?!

So what is your ident”IT”y? Is it time for a change?





6 thoughts on “So, what’s your Ident “IT”y?

  1. WOW Chantal! All I can say is WOW. You know you always inspire me…but in a particularly magnified way after reading this. You know my struggles and being positive is most often one. Funny, I was going to post a “random” comment about you the other day-thanking you for being an example for what faith looks like (something I lack), then you posted about starting your blog. You continue to bless others and inspire people just by being your genuine you. I am trying to learn from your example (it’s hard for us control freaks LOL). Good luck on your blog and continued blessing to you and your family.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Aww Marsha!!!! Thank you love! Girl, you inspire me! You make raising 3 kids look SO EASY!!! You make working out look SO EASY! You make working multiple jobs SO EASY! You are so in tune with your kids and family and it is amazing to watch. Control-freaks Unite- LOL! Well, I am working on not being a control freak too, lol! It’s hard letting go but my faith makes it so much easier! I appreciate your support and authenticity- it is rare my friend! Feel free to “post” anytime, I can always use a boost!


  2. Living life on the fly can definitely be scary and a foothold to depression or any of its friends. Faith must sustain us. The way you are trusting God and rolling with your new identITy is very cool!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Life is predictably unpredictable. Growing up I had all kinds of the vivid dreams. I just knew I was going to be “somebody”. I’m certainly not the person that I thought that I’d be but I am somebody’s mother, sister, daughter, friend, advocate, and helper. I like the person that I’ve evolved to be but sometimes I do wonder “what if”?. I’ve endured several harsh life lessons along my journey but they helped me to be kinder, sweeter, more brave, less selfish, more humble and less naïve. Keep it up, Chantal!


    1. Thank you Kendelle! Yes, it’s amazing how life takes us down different paths than we dreamed ! That’s awesome how much insight and confidence you have about your journey and to know there’s still so much more that’s in store for you!!! Many Blessings my friend!


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